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Saturday, March 19th, 2011 10:01 pm
SO, Parcel. How about that LJ of yours? You gonna post?

Yep! My first post in weeks and weeks is about a game no one on my f-list cares about!

-Companions aren’t all or nothing love-you-or-hate-you in their relationships. I sure like being able to be an ass without getting the “Oh yeah I know you’re the only thing protecting the world right now, but you’re also kind of a dick. Good luck with that. Seeya.”

-Companions are just as cool as in Origins. (BONUS BAD: Except Anders. That boy has some TERRIBLE judgment.)

-Companions are bi-romantic! You know, Bioware, a lot of companies are re-releasing games before they’re all that old. Why don’t you remake Origins and let my Dalish elf dude get it on with everyone in the game? Like it should be!

-ACTUAL TOUGH CHOICES instead of “We are too angry/scared to solve this ourselves, here’s two really bad options and one good middle-ground that you have to talk a little bit more to find.” The whole game was kind of like Orzimmar in the moral department which, as much as I really HATED Dwarves and HATED their kingdom, it was more engaging for me to feel like my actions in the story had consequences that I didn’t intend beyond SAVING EVERYONE FOREVER.

-Voice acting! I’m so glad nobody has to read my Hawke’s thoughts anymore!

-Combat! Oh thank god, it feels like you’re doing something in combat now! It may be only pressing one button as fast as you can at the most basic, but it’s better than having select an enemy, than be treated to ten productions of The Wily Warden Wallops A Winsome Whelp every damn fight.

-No more 5-hour dungeons.


-Get. Some new. Enemies. I am so sick of the endless parade of Shades, Abominations, and Slavers. No, it’s not a parade. It’s a convention, a constant and unrelenting goddamn stream of these same types of enemies. I had veritable platoons of Shades doing kicklines and handstands in front of my face, an endless circus of Shades, for an audience of Shades with Shades as clowns, the acrobats, and all the animals. It was something like the third wave in a row of 10-12 Shades that I finally had to put it down and walk away, lest I burn the image of a Shade onto my retinas.

-The romances, for all their freedom, were kind of underwhelming. I flirted with Fenris, slept with Fenris, Fenris broke up with me, and then…that was it. Man, in Origins, when I made the cold hearted killer love me over the course of a year and then broke his heart when I sacrificed myself to save the world and it was TRAGIC and BUEATIFUL and now it’s just. “Yep, you sure are a slave that I helped. I’ve loved you these past 6 years. And stuff.” Maybe it was my fault for going with Fenris, but yeesh.

-Um, maybe we could see some actual Templar abuse, instead of just taking all the Terrible and cramming it into one lady? I mean, you know where all those aforementioned Shades came from? The evil mages that summoned them. You know how many evil mages I ran across? Oh, about one for every Three Shades. The Templar-Mage war is supposed to be one of the huge conflicts of this universe, but all we really got was a Gormless Kind-of-Rough Moron Brigade with the World’s Worst Boss, put-upon by wizards and witches who could SUMMON DEMONS AND CONTROL YOUR MIND WITH YOUR OWN BLOOD. If I didn’t know the backstory already, I’d think the Templars were just really bad Ghost Hunters.

- OK, maybe it’s just me, but juxtaposing “complicated and painful politics” with “BWAHAHA FOUNTAINS OF BLOOD BURSTING ENTRAILS LOOK AT THE GORE GLORIOUS WONDERFUL VISERA WHEEEEE!!!” undermines the politics a bit.

- I don’t really mind that the game is so short, but a few more locations would have been nice.

-Only three dialogue choices? WTF?! In Origins you had about 5-6 for any given conversation. Now, it’s Perfect, Snot, or More Different Snot.

-If I wanted to read the codex, I’d go read the codex. You don’t have to bring it up every. Time.

I guess I am just nitpicking now. But final verdict: Fun world to explore. Fun game to play. Not quite as good as Origins.


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